Monday, February 23, 2009

The King of Musicals


I've been trying to think of a way to describe, in the few short words that make up a post, just what fabulosity is in store for me in 58 short days when I go to see Jerry Springer: The Opera. I couldn't put it any better than this blurb from the Opera House's website:

A pre-op transsexual… A man with nappy fetish… A pole-dancing housewife… Dancing Klansmen… The Devil… And a Jesus who admits he’s just a little bit ‘gay’…

A cast of 21 performers, with an 8-piece band, play a succession of lowlife characters, each desperate for their own ‘Jerry Springer’ moment. They fight, they cuss, they reveal their secrets – all via a sung-through score that ranges from pop and Broadway to classical and contemporary opera.

“It’s got tragedy, it’s got violence, there are people screaming at each other and you can’t understand what they’re saying. It’s perfect for opera.” Richard Thomas, Conductor

And oh my lordy David Wenham is Jerry! Be still my beating fun-stick.

How ever will I hold down my job, perform home economics, and remember to wash and dress myself when such a transcendental, transformative experience awaits? (Seriously, any suggestions welcome.)

The only thing that would top off the show itself would be a pre- or post-show interview with the pre-op transsexual, the chap with the nappy fetish, or the pole-dancing housewife, etc.

I reckon it's so gonna happen because my brother's uncle's sister's nephew snogged a guy who knows the chick who used to work behind the bar in the restaurant across the road from where the guy who donated his left testicle to the infertile couple who were on the real Springer show in June a couple of years ago used to have noodles after work. It's all coming together beautifully.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sadly, (unless you have created a whole phoney Opera House website) this is for real!

squib said...

Kettle, I can't figure out whether a)you really are dying to see this or b)your sarcasm knob is on Very High

Kettle said...

Ah yes, uh-hm Anon, very sad that it's for real, uh-hm. Who would waste their money on such faff?

And Squib, yes yes, it's my sarcasm knob stuck on Very High, as opposed to irrational, inexplicable and inexcusable enthusiasm ;)

Mad Cat Lady said...

OMG!!!
David Wenham ....
*I don't know how to draw an icon with it's tongue hanging out to it's ankles but if I could it would be here - effing hey!*
sigh

Kettle said...

I know, Maddy!! I'm sure Mr Wenham will turn an otherwise naff piece of musical theatre into something profound and, well, hot.

PS Squib, I fear my sarcasm comment sounded a bit sarcastic. I am actually one of three people in Australia (possibly the entire Oceania region) who like musicals. I can't tell you how excited I get at the end of a season when they start advertising tix for $20 just to fill the theatres... it feels like Christmas every time :)

squib said...

Kettle, I fear now I'm even more confused

Kettle said...

Oh no Squib! I'm just making it worse. The more I try to fix it the more sarcastic I sound.

Or maybe no-one can believe anyone likes musicals :)

squib said...

I like musicals too, Kettle. But there is a limit