Sunday, November 8, 2009

A question regarding those writerly types

I sent an email recently to a Sydney writer's literary agent inviting both said Sydney writer and agent to my Christmas party; everyone loves fruit mince pies, a nice brewski and some Christmas cheer, right? And even if they don't, I love sending emails so my invitation was going to happen regardless of the consensus on fruit mince pies, beer and Christmas cheer.

So off my email went, and I wasn't actually expecting a reply but this has just turned up in my inbox from Mr/Ms Literary Agent:

Many thanks for the invitation. If I hadn't had to say no to so many invitations for [insert name here] I might be able to accept. Alas, it isn't possible.

In terms of logic, there's no particular reason why saying no to other invitations precludes the acceptance of mine, right? Just like if a waiter asks you if you'd like to order something from the specials menu you're not automatically barred from ordering off the full menu as well, yeah?

On the positive side, I like any email that includes the word 'alas'. It is a seriously under-used words these days; join with me to bring back 'alas'! (In fact, if you have a spare moment today I would love it if you joined me on one of my other campaigns: I am currently most concerned with disengaging 'augurs' from 'well'; do not go 'auguring well' into that good night, I say!)

But back to the email, my questions to you are:
1. Should I reply?
2. If so:
2.1. Should I reply knowingly, like I'm on top of the fact I've been bumped for no logical reason but with all the good cheer implied by 'alas'? OR
2.2. Should I respond with 'tude?


3. Should I quietly and humbly accept that I am not a unique and beautiful snowflake but in fact simply one of the Christmas-party-inviting hordes?

What say you?


Mad Cat Lady said...

It is with regret I receive your declination of my invitation to participate in season jocularity, singing and frivolity.

Alas I feel it behoves me to advise, I shall not be able to send you a mince pie.

Kettle said...

Brilliant, MCL! I do love a bit of behoving; I shall endeavour to use it in a sentence today, along with 'alas' (and if I'm feeling really game I'll go for 'mammoth', 'chump' and 'pontoon' too, just for yucks).

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Cripes, I didn't know a Sydney literary type was coming to my Christmas do!

*Note to self - get more gin in*

squib said...

Do you actually know this agent or is he/she a complete stranger?

the projectivist said...

kudos to you Mme Kettle for sending that invitation! perhaps if you'd mentioned what whore's-derves you were serving, the answer might have been more positive?

Kettle said...

Hold the gin, Ramon! You're spared the Sydney literary type at your Chrissy do: s/he is washing his/her hair that night. Phew, that's today's bullet dodged.

Squib, the agent and I are, alas, strangers, and strangers we shall stay it appears. Unless of course you're an agent and you recently received an invitation to a Sydney Christmas party and you're only pretending you don't live in Sydney, in which case, don't be a stranger! Rescind your 'no', send me a 'yes' and come share some eggnog.

And Ms P, a marvellous suggestion! I really should have outlined the 'whore's-derves' menu. I suspect a Christmas party at your place would be in no way dull.

squib said...

Ah, have another barrel of beer Mr/Ms Literary Agent while I just get my manuscript and that contract... ho ho ho

Kettle said...

Ho ho, no no, Squib! No manuscript to flog, I'm afraid. I actually wrote to ask if I could interview the writer then thought, while I was tapping away, why not invite him/her to the Christmas party, bit o' fun and all that.

I do think a barrel of beer is essential for any contract discussion, though, from signing up to video store membership to taking out a post office box.

squib said...

I am always available for an interview, my dear Kettle friend. The only fly in the ointment being of course that I don't have a book per se but I'm sure we could use our imaginations

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

I think we all have a book in us, Cde. Squib.

Mine is What's that thing on me? Get it off, get it off!!!: Your guide to the DTs

Kettle said...

Squibelline you have poems, and I've been mulling over writing to you about them for a thingy I'm planning for Feb next year.

Ramon a fine title! I look forward to its release (and cheers for the laugh on a hot and sticky Thursday arvo).

By the way, I'm assuming you mean Delirium Tremens as opposed to Dallas Theological Seminary?

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Aww, fair shake of the sauce bottle, Kettle.

I once moved to Adelaide after a prolonged drinking session but I draw the line at Dallas!

Senji said...

Dude, you must respond and you must respond with 'tude! Something rapsterish like: Yo motherfokker! You be dissing the do at ma crib? I be poppin' a cap in yo lily white asssssssssss!

squib said...

Kettle, oh my! You mean to tell me you have a piece planned on glossophobia and poetry clams? Seriously though, if you need any poets, I know stacks

Ramon, I draw the line at Ceduna

Kettle said...

Ramon I eagerly await your post explaining your move to Adelaide. Mercy, what a place to end up after a prolonged drinking session.

And dear Senji, you are a trouble-maker of the most admirable kind.

And Squib, that's a great offer, thanks. I should have a clearer idea what my thingy will be about closer to Christmas so I'll drop you a note around then, if that's cool; cheers!