I maintained during our long journey that it was better not to have expectations because being expectation-less left you free to experience something for how it appeared to you in the moment. She maintained the wrong, oops, I mean the opposite view. This made for many interesting hours in our very-tiny-close-proximity-oh-my-God-I-can-see-your-nose-hairs 1.2 litre Renault Clio (not to mention in our two-person tent).
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So I've always thought I was foot-loose and expectation-free but I've started to realise, to my horror, that I do indeed have expectations and they're rather easily upset.
And how have these hideous expectations revealed themselves to me? Why through an innocuous little misnomer.
I recently bought a book for my son: The Dangerous Book for Boys. I expected practical suggestions for jail breaks and jewellery heists (or, more usefully, jewellery heists followed by jail breaks), for how to escape a grizzly bear by sawing off your leg then using said leg to hit said bear, and surviving in a post-apocalyptic (i.e. Liberal/Coalition) world. So dangerous + a pile of folios folded, assembled and glued + son (fun for).
What did I get when I opened The Dangerous Book for Boys (so newly purchased and so erroneously titled)? 'The Greatest Paper Plane in the World,' 'Understanding Grammar - Parts One, Two and Three,' and my favourite, 'Five Pen and Paper Games'. So lame + lame + lame.
I expected something good and realised I'd paid top clams for, well, 'Some Australian Trees' and 'Growing Sunflowers'.
So what did I learn from this foray into the world of expectations? That it really is better to be perennially mildly ambivalent than deeply, personally disappointed.
7 comments:
I don't know, Kettle. Grammar can be dangerous. Take for example, punctuation. Consider:
"Let's eat, Grandma"
or
"Let's eat Grandma"
Expectations are nasty things. Look what happened to Pip. I remember expectations were especially disagreeable in the days of singledom. Also, in the areas of gift-opening, movie-going, and friendships
Fair enough, Squib, I'm willing to concede grammar should be in 'The Dangerous for Boys,' but I maintain there's nothing dangerous about paper hats (see 'Making a Paper Hat,' page 111) so the book is still partially disappointing.
Expectations are nasty, aren't they? Let's start a petition to ban them! Let's start the Anti-Expectation League! (Or at least the Anti-Disappointment-From-Unfulfilled-Expectations League.)
Yes! Let's eradicate them, Ghostbusters style
Who you gonna call?
The Anti-Expectation League!
[Alternatively the Anti-Disappointment-From-Unfulfilled-Expectations League!]
Wow, catchy.
Will we be using marshmallow in our eradications?
Yes! Toasted ones on sticks. En guard!
Great mental image, Squib. If only I could draw.
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